Thanks, But No Thanks...Teaching our Children How to Use Polite Language over this Holiday Season

Authored By: Chani Selengut, M.S., CCC-SLP

Speech Therapist at The Village Therapy Place

In honor of Thanksgiving, let’s talk about table manners with or without guests present😊

We all want our children to say effortlessly and appropriately, “Please” and “Thank You”.

And the challenge is even greater with our children who have speech delays.

What many parents don’t realize is that “please” and “thank you” are abstract concepts. Toddlers (especially those with a speech and language delay) need to be developmentally ready to learn abstract concepts.

Something else to consider is that “please” and “thank you” won’t help a child use specific language to communicate what he/she wants. The primary goals with a child who has speech delays are to help him or her communicate efficiently and to reduce frustration. “Please” and “thank you” don’t meet either of these goals.

You may be saying to yourself, “OK, so I shouldn't teach my child good manners???”

The truth is, that the best way you can teach good manners is by modeling the use of good manners.

Eventually when your child is ready, he/she will say “please” and “thank you” on his/her own because of positive modeling.

Instead of focusing on teaching an abstract concept that will allow your child to communicate using vague language, focus on making your child an effective communicator.

For further reading on “The Please and Thank You Debate” read the following:

https://www.veipd.org/earlyintervention/2014/12/02/the-please-and-thank-you-debate/

About Us: 

We, at The Village Therapy Place, located in Bergen County- in Wyckoff, NJ, aim to provide integrative, neurodevelopmental, individualized, pediatric therapy in a warm, fun, and collaborative environment. 

We offer pediatric services that include physical therapy, speech therapy, occupational therapy, feeding therapy, and DIR Floortime.  

 At The Village Therapy Place, we utilize current and evidence-based treatment techniques to help treat your child during his PT, OT, speech therapy, feeding therapy and DIR Floortime session. These include sensory integration, reflex integration, therapeutic listening, Kinesiotape, craniosacral therapy, NDT, BrainGym, feeding therapy, PROMPT, to name a few. 

Our expert pediatric therapists offer a variety of treatment options, including 30/45/60 minute sessions, group classes and virtual therapy to best suit a child’s needs. 

 The pediatric physical therapists, occupational therapists & speech therapists at The Village Therapy Place are in constant contact with a child's caregivers to facilitate lasting change. 

Call us today at (201) 201-8220 or email us at office@thevillagetherapyplace.com to speak with a pediatric expert who truly cares!